True story

LaNaya Schmoker


“I cannot and will not pretend this site offers a cure for anyone who has suffered after surviving a traumatic event. It doesn’t. What we are about to begin together is not easy; it is not for everyone.”


To whom it may concern:

For those of you who have had no contact with your young child or children at all, not even supervised visitation, that additionally were not accused of anything to warrant no contact, I feel you! I understand it’s infuriating.

For the Mothers who were not accused of parent alienation, tried to cooperate with a controlling, abusive ex and still lost custody.

For the Mothers who have never had any addiction issues of any sort and still lost custody.

For the Mothers who are extremely stable emotionally and otherwise who still lost custody.

For the Mothers who while your children were in your care never went without their needs and you provided a stable and safe atmosphere who still lost custody.

For the Mothers who either have no mental health issues or who do but have them consistently managed, and still lost custody.

For the Mothers who could not afford a lawyer and lost custody pro se.

For the Mothers who hired an incompetent lawyer and lost custody.

For the Mothers who had an ex with a good lawyer who gave a false impression and a multitude of destructive and absurd lies leading you to lose your child or children.

For the Mothers with disability, low income, or alternative lifestyle that does not impair your ability to raise your children who lost custody anyway.

Losing a young child is a heavy loss. To have no contact with your child is a heavy grief to bare.

To see other Mothers who are not stable emotionally, or otherwise, moving around, cycling through boyfriends, battling addiction, uncooperative with custody and the courts, unmanaged mental health issues, criminal behavior, and overall unable to care for her children consistently have more custody than you, is absolutely bewildering and infuriating.

Some cases are more extreme than others. Some cases are more stark black and white wrong compared to others. Some cases have more shades of gray. Some Mothers have at least some contact while others none at all. Some lost their children when they were older. Some while their children were younger. Some have lost breastfeeding babies.

When you are seeing others with their children, and you are not able to even speak with them on the phone, the pain is heavy.

When you are buried deep under numerous misconceptions and lies so good they made it look like the truth and you haven’t even had an opportunity to properly clarify in court or if you have and the lies have still been believed, it’s shattering.

There are numerous heartbreaking circumstances.

I understand for the Mothers on the more extreme end of the spectrum, with truly no legitimate reasoning whatsoever, that the sting and pain is deeper.

It’s a lonely journey for all of us, but you are not alone.

The only thing that really matters is your Love for your Child.

The Truth. The Whole Truth, with a wide angled lens, all of it, from an eagle eye perspective, down to every nitty gritty detail, and deeper reasonings, does come to light in the end.

All you can do is be the best Mother and person you can be.

Remain Loving, Forgiving, Kind, Cooperative, Authentic, Healthy, Consistent, Stable, Flexible, Self-Reflecting, Inner Focused, Respectfully assertive where need be, Taking full responsibility if you do have any part in the circumstances, always changing for the better where you need and are able to, acting from a place of clarity and love in each and every decision or act forward.

Much Love Dear Mothers. ❤️


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